THE UNOFFICIALFOOTBALLERSFAN ARCHIVE↗Transcript links use the exact YouTube video’s clock. Machine transcripts can contain errors.
Mike declares himself captain and introduces only best friend Jason beside him. The published video reveals what the transcript never names: full-size cardboard Jay Griz occupies absent Andy's left host chair and microphone from the opening through the close. Jay receives no introduction, live line, theme, sound cue, graphic, costume, or acknowledgement.
The opening says Falcon has finally returned from a massive dump that lasted the whole weekend. Direct video then shows him at Deucers Alley dressed so thoroughly in 49ers red and white that the hosts say the team threw up on him. Fifty-five minutes later, a diarrhea segue reveals his workstation empty and only two producers remaining; the desk identifies Falcon as the missing man, quotes his promise to give the toilet the business, and names the new event 'mid show falconing.'
The hosts expose a secret hometown rivalry bet between Saints fan Papa Josh and Falcons fan Kyle the Borgogan. Josh owes rival-color face paint, but a home photo is rejected because Kyle works remotely and the punishment must mean something. The desk orders half-red and half-black paint at work and gets Josh to promise it this week, probably tomorrow. No face paint appears in this published episode.
Mike and Jason get sophisticated by celebrating good performances before detonating on the bad. The run yields Derek Henwee, Taysam King of the Hill, Xavier Legit, Sam Starnold, Nico Ballins, Laser Mayfield, Skidmark Andrews, Kyle Armed Pits, Breece's Feces, Garrett Won't-son, Rome a Doomsday, Kyler Murr, Carson Steele My FAAB, and Carson Steele My Draft Picks.
Mike introduces Kenneth Walker's Monday-night return as the return of the Bone Zone and asks Jason for confidence. Jason immediately says not really, citing a terrible Lions matchup and an expected split after injury.
When Jeremy McNichols appears in the recap, one live host asks whether they remember 'Sticky McNichols.' The other does not. The first explains that he has always called McNichols that in his own head, surprising his cohost; the unlabeled transcript does not safely identify which of Mike or Jason owns the private nickname.
Mike declares himself captain and introduces only himself and best friend Jason as the live hosts. Direct review of the published video reveals the unspoken third presence: full-size cardboard Jay Griz occupies absent Andy's left host chair and microphone from the opening through the close, but receives no introduction, line, sound drop, graphic, costume, or other acknowledgement. Deucers Alley supplies a complete Falcon bathroom arc. The hosts announce that Matt 'Falcon' Pingrey is back from a massive dump that supposedly lasted the entire weekend, then the video cuts to all three producers and visibly shows Falcon covered in red-and-white 49ers clothing; the hosts say the team threw up on him. Near the end, a diarrhea segue prompts another booth check. The published video now shows only two producers and a vacant left station, and the next paragraph identifies the missing worker as Falcon, calls the departure 'mid show falconing,' and says the diarrhea continues. A separate secret rivalry bet establishes Papa Josh as a Saints fan and Kyle the Borgogan as a Falcons fan. Josh is supposed to wear the winning rival's colors as face paint. The hosts reject a work-from-home photo as too easy, demand half-red and half-black face paint at the office, and get Josh to promise the punishment this week, probably the next day. Direct video shows no face paint in this episode, so it remains a dialogue-promised future consequence. Monday Punday produces Derek Henwee, Taysam King of the Hill, Xavier Legit, Sam Starnold, Nico Ballins, Laser Mayfield, Skidmark Andrews, Kyle Armed Pits, Breece's Feces, Garrett Won't-son, Rome a Doomsday, Kyler Murr, Carson Steele My FAAB, and Carson Steele My Draft Picks. Mike also announces that Kenneth Walker's Bone Zone returns, although Jason dislikes the matchup, and one unidentified host surprises the other by revealing that he has always privately called Jeremy McNichols 'Sticky McNichols.'
8 for Braylon Allen is not quite as indicative. Like if you look at the snap counts, you had basically like 70% of the snaps still going to Breece Hall. This is just a bad game. The Denver defense is really good. But next week at Minnesota on the road against one of those teams we said you can't run on. I mean, you're still starting Breece every week. Sure. Speaking of diarrhea, I'm going to check in with the douche's alley. Someone's missing. Oh, no. Someone has gone. He just ran out. Guys, it's not a bit anymore. Yeah, this is, this is a doctor is needed. I DM'd him and said, this is probably going to come up on the air. And he said, good. Because I'm going to give this toilet the business. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my goodness. We got to, we got to get this man on a, on a diet, get him some fiber. Make sure he's a little bit more regular.
Dude, the falcon. Mid show falconing. Amazing. The diarrhea continues. I mean, at least he waited for the right segment. Yeah, yeah, we're in the right area. Carson Steele. I think that that dream is probably gone of it will either be Cream Hunt or perhaps Clyde Edward DeLare. James Cook for the for the bills. Again, everyone, the bills, it was it was not what we wanted. They had to abandon the run early. I mean, in my opinion, they should not have. James Cook was, James Cook was looking good. He was looking like James Cook. They were not cooking in the passing game. I thought it was a bad decision to move away from him so quickly. Yeah, I think they just needed to throw the ball to him because it is difficult. He had one target. It's difficult to run on Baltimore in general, and then you were down early. So I do understand abandoning the run. It's not going to work out for you, but I don't understand why they didn't.
utilize Cook in the scream game, get him out in space, and then use his speed. Cam Acres. Oh, man. I was. Scam Acres. I was more on his side this year, or this week, I should say. Last week it was, hey, the volume should be there, so maybe he's okay. This week against the Jaguars, it felt like this, this should be a good situation. It was not. It was not. CJ Stroud and Nico took care of it, and so did. Agumbo Waleh, the other running back. Ramandre Stevenson fumbled immediately. I couldn't believe that they, I mean, they still had him play the majority of snaps. Yeah, they came back, but 13 for 43. He did have four catches for 19 yards. What's your temperature on Remandre Stevenson? And Gibson had another huge chunk play. I'm actually fine with Ramandre Stevenson. I think Romandre is a good buy-low candidate right now.
Miami, Houston, Jacksonville are the next three weeks. I mean, you had two great defenses when you were on the road. They went and played the Jets and they went and played the Niners. And the Patriots aren't a good team, but they still kept going to him. You know, he had 18 opportunities, five of which were through the air, which is more valuable for fantasy. But he was playing against a really hard defense with a really bad offense and a really bad offensive line. So I don't expect him to be great by any means. Don't hear that. I think Remandre is just going to continue getting volume. And when there are good matchups, I think he'll have enough fantasy points where he should be started. I think I agree with that, but that will be, that's a brutal situation to be in where Ramandre is, you emotionally, when you see Remandre in your team, you feel like, oh, I have an RB2. But I think he's just an RB2 matchup based only. Yeah. Like the week one,
was the Bengals. Well, it turns out the Bengals defense is not very good. The Seattle Seahawks, we still don't know because the Seahawks defensive numbers overall are okay, but they have, they've had chump matchups so far. Yeah, they've had chump matchups and we haven't seen yet tonight's performance. This next week, though, against Miami. I mean, Miami right now is 29th in fantasy points giving up to running back. So we'll be all right. Yeah. At the wide receiver position, Garrett Wilson. This is, it was predictable because it was against Patrick Sartan. The Denver Broncos are a good defense, but now they play Minnesota next week. It's, we, we got to see something here. Brighter days are ahead. We, we knew, I mean, we talked about this before the matchup. The schedule has been about as bad as it can get for Garrett Wilson. It has been. Now, I am.
I mean, I was done even before this season of making excuses for Garrett Wilson. At some point, a dude has to do something with all the targets he gets. And he's still getting them. I mean, he had eight targets this week, nine the week before, 11 week one. You know, he's only had one game where he scored 10 fantasy points. You can't be getting double digit targets on the reg and not putting up fantasy points ever. Agreed. Hasn't even been a wide receiver two one time this season. So brighter days are ahead, but he is not, Garrett Wilson is not a Justin Jefferson. Like, that's what you hoped. You hope that Garrett Wilson was going to come in here and really show that he is one of the top five wide receivers in the NFL. And if he gets good quarterback play, then he'll put up top five fantasy numbers. And he's not. He's a very good NFL wide receiver, but he's not, you know.
I saw someone talking about it online. And, you know, you just look at the eyeball test. Look at Malik neighbors. Look at him coming in. It's like, you can't stop that, dude. You cannot stop him. He's, he's a different level of athleticism. He's like that Jamar Chase type. Sure. Garrett Wilson, you can stop him. Yeah. So maybe top 12 is not it, but 12 to 24. That's what we're going to hope for. Brandon Ayyuk continues his suck fest. His, now again, The Rams one was, that one was weird two weeks ago when Juan Jennings had the incredible game. Schedule-wise, again, it's not been great. Garrett Wilson's had a brutal schedule. So the 49ers have as well, especially talking about Brandon Ayuk with the Jets in week one. Minnesota, they're legit. And then Christian Gonzalez and the Patriots, I think that was what he got.
Arizona next week, I'm going to play Brandon Ayyuk. I'm going to do it. You can't stop me. Yeah, yeah. I think you should. And then next week, if we have another 50 yards from Brandon Ayuk, we'll hit the panic alarm. Amari Cooper. Oh, man. He did have an 80-yard touchdown call back. Well, not only called back, but called back for nothing. Right. It was called back on a hold. I watched that play. Like, I didn't see that play live. I missed it when we were watching it. So I went back. and watched it. So I watched it and I watched it. I didn't see the holding call and what number it was attributed to. So I couldn't even find, I was watching each offensive lineman. And I was like, which one was called to hold? Because I didn't see it on any of them. It just looked like a totally normal play. 80 yard touchdown. Amari Cooper should not be in this category. Amari Cooper should be nine targets.
five receptions, 115 yards, and a touchdown. He should be in the complete other section. We do have a tiny little note here that came through from Spotrack, which is a kind of like a salary cap website that helps you track contracts. And they reported the Browns converted all but $1.21 million of Amari Cooper's salary into a signing bonus, which makes him an extremely affordable trade candidate. Kansas City? Dude, the chiefs need to get Amari Cooper. But I'm also not not saying that we'll see. We'll see how the Cleveland Browns are doing. And if Omari Cooper gets traded. Zay Flowers was part of the Ravens experience. The Bears, Caleb Williams had 157 yards. DJ Moore did have a touchdown to save his day. DJ Moore was okay. Although what's going on with his attitude? Did you notice this?
DJ Moore's like a... Because DJ Moore... He's a pissy pants. Because DJ Moore has every single year of his career except for once had competent quarterback play. But you know what? It's like he's expecting failure. You watch like he should have had another touchdown. He's a broken shell of a man. Caleb Williams is terrible right now. Caleb Williams hit him. I mean, he obviously got the touchdown, but he actually should have had two touchdowns. where Caleb, I think, threw a good ball. When I watched it live, I was like, oh my gosh, Caleb, you, you way over through DJ Moore. And then you watch the replay from the other angle and you go, why did DJ Moore, like, DJ Moore, he ran the route, but he just slowed down and didn't look back because he just assumed, I'm not going to get the ball. Maybe. This play's not going to work. And then it was like, if you just kept running, he would have hit you in stride in the end zone. So I don't know. And then, and then have you seen like, he's sitting by himself at the end of the bench, like all game.
Ever game now? I tell you. He is a broken man. He was my tradeaway guy from last week. Three for 22. He had a touchdown, a touchdown, and he's outside of the top 30 wide receivers. That's how bad it is. Carolina next week, I don't know. I'm out. I'm out. Quentin Johnston, we knew that was going to be bad against the Chiefs. Brock Bowers, really, really disappointing with no Devante Adams, only two for 19. Kyle Pitts was a goose. Mike Gisicki was negative. A side note here in your dynasty leagues and maybe even redraft. We'll see Eric All Jr. of the Cincinnati Bengals. I went in all my dynasty leagues last week to try to pick him up and he was rostered everywhere. He is someone to keep an eye on. This could just be dynasty for now, but especially with Mike Gisicki being this bad this week.
He's from Iowa. He's from tight end you. The arrow is pointed up for him. I can't predict a breakout or anything, but the arrow is pointing up. For me, this is just a dynasty thing. I wouldn't be picking him up as a stash and redraft. You don't need to be rostering him. But he does look like he will eventually get this job and win this job from a dynasty perspective. You expect a good offense here. You expect T. Higgins gone. Certainly check if he's on your waivers and pick him up. All right. So we're already very long. So I think maybe we'll save the Baltimore Ravens discussion for tomorrow. But we need to have one. Mark Andrews, one target. He dropped it. Isaiah likely one catch for 26 yards. Again, crazy weird game. But now we're four weeks into a season. And we've had to make.
We've had to try and figure out what happened to Mark Andrews and three of four of them. It's unbelievable. I mean, it is, it's crazy because Mark Andrews is still to this moment, an integral cog of this offense. Yes, he's not. He's busted. He's not broken. Part of the heart of this team, he's, you know, it's not like he's on the way towards retirement. but he's unusable in fantasy. He has a 17-game pace right now. If he plays like he's played this first month for the whole season, he would have at the end of the year 25 catches for 275 yards. And that's it. We'll talk about him more during the tight end section of tomorrow's waiver show. That is going to do it. Everybody for the show, thank you for tuning in. Enjoy the games tonight. Hope you get the points you need.
And we will see you tomorrow. Talking waivers, big-time waivers tomorrow. Goodbye. Thank you for listening to another episode of the Fantasy Footballers podcast. Join our fantasy football community on join thefoot.com. And follow us on Twitter at theFF ballers.