THE UNOFFICIALFOOTBALLERSFAN ARCHIVE↗Transcript links use the exact YouTube video’s clock. Machine transcripts can contain errors.
After early-recorded shows allow family vacations or staycations, the hosts return to more than one hundred UDK player-profile videos plus a June draft-kit deadline and joke that they should not even be recording the podcast.
The idea that the NFL already has enough money becomes a Scrooge McDuck debate: build another vault, keep treasure hunting at an advanced age, and leave headspace so the gold does not feel cramped.
A Justin Jefferson slot-receiver comparison slips into 'full-time snot,' repeats as 'snot snot,' and ends with a host becoming a hanky.
A host tries to fire the party cue and money drop simultaneously for Ja'Marr Chase and Tee Higgins. The sounds do not mash up, the operator cannot immediately stop them, and the setup is identified as exactly what Al Borland loves to hear. Direct frames show no visual graphic or producer cutaway.
The hosts imagine an incoming rookie being protected from Jameis Winston: Jameis may not talk inside the facility, mentor, or become a friend, because his chalkboard lesson is to forget the play, throw deep, and believe in his heart.
Brandon Cooks is said to have lived from a suitcase for ten years. Soon afterward, 'preclude' multiplies into proclude, perclude, and perclusion before being translated as 'doesn't stop them,' and a Conklin comparison that briefly demotes Big Montana is immediately recanted in Big Montana's favor.
The Deucers had debated the tush push at lunch, and Al audibly says he did not support his Packers' proposal to ban it. The hosts argue opponents should do more squats instead of legislating. At the close, Al accepts a trip to Green Bay to protest the play and receives a declaration of permanent unity. Direct frames show him only as an off-camera voice.
Jason, previously a Pacheco Parade leader, is explicitly handed the losers segment and calls Isaiah Pacheco's career done. A sad cue lands just as he mentions the broken leg, and Jason says Pacheco will not be fantasy relevant again literally until Jason dies.
After mangling 'second-half standouts,' the hosts say the episode has been tough because they did not stretch. Their spontaneous vocal exercise becomes 'Randy Moss never stretched' and 'The human torch was denied a bank loan.'
While reconstructing CJ Stroud's prior redraft cost, a host asks Kyle to correct the top-five-or-six recollection; no reply is safely attributed and no producer cutaway appears.
All three hosts return after family vacations or staycations and immediately face more than one hundred UDK player-profile videos plus the draft kit deadline. An NFL money tangent becomes a Scrooge McDuck vault that needs headspace even when full. Mike's analysis slips from 'slot' to 'full-time snot,' producing a hanky, and a host then tries to combine a party cue with the money drop; the two-button mashup fails, cannot immediately be stopped, and is exactly what Al Borland is said to love. Direct published frames show only the hosts during the audio collision—no visible graphic or producer cutaway. Jameis Winston's imagined rookie mentorship forbids him from speaking inside the facility because his entire lesson is to forget the play, throw deep, and believe. Brandon Cooks lives from a suitcase; a 'preclude' failure spirals through proclude/perclude/perclusion; a comparison that briefly demotes Big Montana is immediately recanted in his favor. Al's Packers fandom gets a false Mecole Hardman/MVS fact, then the Deucers' lunch debate reveals Al opposed Green Bay's proposed tush-push ban. The hosts reduce defense to 'do more squats' and legislation, punctuated by 'We're going to win!' The strongest player-lore reversal belongs to Jason: explicitly handed the losers segment, the former Pacheco Parade leader calls Isaiah Pacheco's career done after a perfectly ill-timed sad cue, then says Pacheco will not regain fantasy relevance literally until Jason dies. At the rough close, the hosts admit they should have stretched, recite 'Randy Moss never stretched' and 'The human torch was denied a bank loan,' and ask Al to fly to Green Bay to protest the tush push; he audibly accepts with their blessing. Direct frames at both Al exchanges stay on the three-host desk, so Al is an off-camera producer voice, not a visible appearance.
for George Pickens and to recover what you spent to get DK. And to Jason's point, you know, if you want to say Metcalf is a fantasy loser as well, you're going to an Arthur Smith offense. That last year, you know, his fantasy point ranks Arthur Smith 30, 32, and 29. That's a pretty good run of being bad. For multiple teams. For multiple teams, you know, pass rate over expectations. So how many opportunities are you going to get? 29, 32, 31. Is that going to change? I don't know. It's hard to see that being fixed by Aaron Rogers. So I think both of those guys are in that boat. All right. And I'm going with, unfortunately, C.J. Stroud. The beat continues. This one is a bit up in the air because it is just at face value right now. What is Houston doing on their offensive line, which, to be fair to the team, the offensive line was.
hot, hot, stinky garbage last year. And 52 sacks taken in 17 games for CJ Stroud. He had 235 quarterback pressures. And you saw it. The Texans offense was not the same. Yes, wide receiver variables as well. But it's really hard when you're a pocket passer and your offensive line is pure garbage. And the biggest one, They made the move. They trade Laramie Tunzel, which, I mean, they got stuff, they got some stuff back for him. But it's like this is a premier left tackle who is one of the bright spots who actually on your offensive line. And to come in here and be almost replacing the whole entire thing, it's, it's really, really risky business. It was definitely the moves this offseason with Houston have made me say in my head like, you got a plan, right?
Yeah. That's kind of the way I feel about it. And I hope they're outsmarting everybody. And we get a great, they figured it out and all these new guys coming in. We're getting a congealed offensive line for Stroud. But where we are right now in March, it feels bad. It feels. It feels like so bad that you can't even make. This is a team that went all in last year, right? They went out and they trade for Joe Mixing. They signed Stefan Diggs. They've got a rookie contract. So they're willing to pay money. You know, they're willing to invest to make this team great. And now one year later, after a little bit of disappointment, but still success. This is why I think they have to be smarter than us. Because otherwise, they're way dumber than us. You know what I mean? Yeah, I know what you're saying. It happens sometimes. Like, it's one or the other. Like they have to, you couldn't have come out of last season and said, you know, the real problem was our offensive line was too good. But there's no way. Do you think there's a way that their offensive line is bad?
better losing one of the best tackles in the league? I mean, it's certainly possible that as a unit they could put together through the draft and the remaining pieces. We were relying on his talent too much. You guys, you guys all sucked because you thought he could do it all. I mean, I guess the counterpoint to it would be like C.J. Stroud was he struggled because of his line last year. Like it didn't, whatever they had wasn't working. Right. I get that. But yeah, no, I mean, at face value, you're kind of saying, you got a plan, right? Yeah. You look at Chicago, and at least their moves, it's super evident what their plan is for protecting this young quarterback and giving them every opportunity. And, you know, you lose offensive coordinator, you lose the offensive line. Right now you're like, huh? The bounce for fantasy football is, I mean, this is a full whiplash. Heading into last year, CJ Stroud had rocketed up to being people's like QB2, QB3 in a dynasty. And then I think he was.
Kyle, you can correct me. He was a top five or top six fantasy redraft quarterback. And right now on Underdog, he is the QB 17. That is so insane to me. He didn't get that Christian Kirk bump? Of just of snapping back. You're like right ahead of him, Dak, Drake May. So five to 17? Yeah. So. I think 17 is probably too far. Okay, so DAC, Drake, May, and CJ Stroud. I'll take, DAC is fine. DAC is just forever undervalued. I'll take DAC over Stroud. I think I'd go Stroud over Drake May, though. I'd probably give that a shot with Nico Collins. Yeah, I mean, you talked about the Tampa Bay offense hasn't changed any of their, they haven't vacated any targets. Right. You know who else hasn't? Embarrassingly, New England. Hmm.
Well, they haven't vacated their targets because they had very few. No, but I mean, you should not be bringing back. They're running it back. That's all I'm, that's my point. Well, but the boys are back in town. You shouldn't be bringing back what you had on offense for New England. They failed at every acquisition of a wide receiver. At least C.J. Stroud has one of the top five guys in the league in Nico Collins. Yeah. Yeah. That's my only point there. I mean, you could lean on Drake May's legs and say that makes him a better fantasy player. It was more like I don't.
I don't know if I know exactly where my feelings are for Stroud for 2025, but just a guy who was the QB5, was setting the world on fire, was untouchable in Dynasty to barely a quarterback too. It's wild. Yeah. The vacated targets thing, all their receivers are on rookie contracts. So it's not like they're just going to cut, you know, Kashon Boutet and Jalen Polk and all these guys. I don't think it's indicative of they're happy with it. And I expect them to do something in the draft. They have been, you talk about fantasy losers or they tried to trade for MacCath. The Patriots right now on the offensive side have not been able to fix the problems that they have at the wide receiver room. So, I mean, if we're bringing up Kashon Booty is a like key cog in the offense, we've got a problem for Drake May.
Other losers potentially, Anthony Richardson? Oh, for sure. I mean, you bring in a quarterback to compete with a top three NFL draft pick. That is massively concerning. You have a gauge on who you think is going to win that job to start the year? I think it'll be Anthony Richardson to start the year. And do I think Anthony Richardson plays the full season? Absolutely not. I hope he does. That would be awesome. That means that the Colts are good, that Anthony Richardson is good. Because if he's mediocre, if he's a 500 quarterback, they're just going to. pull the rug at some point. Do you think Sam Darnold? I mean, leaving that cushy situation, great offensive line, great explosive wide receivers in Minnesota going into Seattle with a new system. Fantasy-wise, it's worse this year than it was last year for Sam Darnold. But this was about the next best thing because I could have seen Darnold ended up ending up and not really getting a starting job. Would you like him more in Seattle?
with Cup and J.S.N. or more in Pittsburgh with D.K. McCaff and George Pickens. I think Seattle. I think because of Arthur Smith, I agree. Yeah, the defense. The team makeup of like how the Steelers play ball. I'm more excited about the Seahawks. Fantasy-wise. Okay. Okay. And then I think that'll be it for right now. We got Regressor and Press coming on Thursday. Second House. standoff second half standouts edition. We're doing great. Yeah, it's been a tough one. We're doing real great. We should have stretched first. We didn't stretch it. We didn't stretch it. Randy Moss never stretched. Oh, I thought you were doing one of those vocal acts. Randy Moss never stretched. The human torch was denied a bank loan. And do you realize next week, rookie preview shows to get us ready for the NFL draft, which is in Green Bay this year? Al, are you flying out there to?
protest the tush push in person? With your blessing, I'd be happy to go. Yeah, man. Hit the road. Go fight. Go fight. Let's stop that stupid play. Me and you, Al, forever and always. Always united. Yeah. Goodbye, everybody. Goodbye. Thank you for listening to another episode of the Fantasy Footballers podcast. Join our fantasy football community on join thefoot.com. And follow us on Twitter at the FF ballers.