THE UNOFFICIALFOOTBALLERSFAN ARCHIVE↗Transcript links use the exact YouTube video’s clock. Machine transcripts can contain errors.
Before the chapter airs, Jason's Boom Boom saga is called too intellectually advanced for ordinary humans and understandable only to AI. Kyle retrieves last week's word 'blutter bunged,' and the hosts compare Jason's approach to Kubrick.
The hosts remember Antonio Gibson as Mike's champion and lost Christian-McCaffrey-style dream, then credit him for selling during a useful stretch and acquiring Garrett Wilson rather than holding the bag.
With Baker Mayfield prepared in a single day, the hosts imagine a gigantic centerfold armband and a children's football printed with numbered plays; even that can fail when he holds the ball upside down.
A quarterback-split point is phrased as Garrett Wilson playing games 'with himself.' The desk immediately notices the double entendre, repeats it, and complicates it further by adding Zach Wilson.
The case for keeping Swift near half the snaps ends with the anatomical diagnosis that his body is made of chewed bubblegum and simply breaks down.
The Lions are said to excel at being dragged down on the one-yard line. The desk's automatic reaction is simply 'Jamal,' because everyone knows Jamaal Williams will receive the touchdown carry.
The listener-built Monday Punday injury label 'Gus bust' is reinterpreted as a hop fart whose smell could waft the Baltimore backfield right back toward Gus Edwards.
When the game's betting total drops while the hosts are discussing it, the desk notices the live movement, says there is a ticker in back, and shouts 'Sell. Sell this game.'
Mike makes clear that Jared Goff is not a detached recommendation: Mike is starting him, his playoff run rests in Goff's 'incapable hands,' and Mike accepts being both president and member of the club.
The desk casually mutates Evan Engram into 'Schmevin Schmingram,' reusing the show's established nonsense-name pattern without stopping the analysis.
Hunter Henry is the steel-underpants tight end of the week, and because he plays Monday, anyone trusting the pick must remain inside the protective garment for an extended wait before the payoff.
Brooks already has Chig Okonkwo before the hosts can recommend him. They explain this with 60 roster spots, commissioner tools, waiver bypasses, and paid secret signings; Brooks's answer is to tell them not to inspect his bench count.
The formal Boom Boom chapter continues at sea: a seafaring kicker burgles Jason and sells him to Cameron Dicker for two cups of farts. The desk reveals that measuring farts in cups came from a video passed around inside the company, debates compression and Jason's preferred two-gallon price, names the fart mart, and rolls directly into the cup of cheese and Wheel of Shame preview. The published video shows the recurring green Boom Boom animation, not a literal sea, market, or fart-cup scene.
The show opens by treating Jason's serialized Boom Boom Kicker as intellectual material beyond ordinary human comprehension: Kyle supplies last week's word 'blutter bunged,' and the hosts compare the storytelling to Kubrick. Mike receives credit for moving his former champion Antonio Gibson after once imagining a Christian McCaffrey future, acquiring Garrett Wilson instead. A one-day Baker Mayfield playbook becomes an accordion centerfold armband, youth-football plays printed on the ball, and a lesson that if Jeff Saturday can coach, Baker can teach the hosts to quarterback. Garrett Wilson analysis accidentally becomes repeated claims that he plays well 'with himself.' DeAndre Swift's body is described as chewed bubblegum, Jamaal Williams's touchdown role becomes an inevitable ritual whenever another Lion is tackled at the one, Gus Edwards's Monday Punday label 'Gus bust' becomes a wafting hop fart, and a falling betting total turns the production booth into a live stock ticker yelling 'Sell.' Mike says his fantasy playoff run rests in Jared Goff's incapable hands and is both president and member of the belief club. Player names mutate into Evan Engram's 'Schmevin Schmingram' and Gerald Everett's 'Mount Everett,' while Hunter Henry requires steel underpants that must stay on until Monday. The strongest crew reveal comes when Brooks already owns Chig Okonkwo: the hosts cite his 60 roster spots, suspect commissioner tools and secret signings, and Brooks warns them not to inspect his bench. The closing Boom Boom chapter has Jason floating blutterbonged at sea, burgled by a seafaring kicker, and sold to Cameron Dicker for two cups of farts. The desk explains that measuring farts in cups came from a video circulated privately inside the company, debates whether Jason should be worth two gallons and how compressed the gas is, names the fart mart, and previews the cup of cheese plus Wheel of Shame.
Who cares? It's going to be nobody or it's going to be a backup or it's going to be a third string guy. And they're going to throw the ball early and often. This team trusts Gino to do it. He has the most completions per game. on first down in the NFL. He's completing an insane 78.6% of passes on first down. The Seahawks offense has been great. Right now, they are an efficient machine. Their third and 15 plus yard pass plays, sixth in an expected points per pass attempt. You've got D.K. Metcalfe and Tyler Lockett, who are going to go ham. He is the quarterback seven on the year.
He's got another great matchup against Carolina and no running game to speak of. So I think Gino Smith is a player that you just need to continue trusting and playing. It's a great start this week. Mike? I'm going with Jared Goff. Jared Garf. Do we have the? Yes. Whenever he is at home and in a plus matchup, he has succeeded at home. He has 17 passing touchdowns in just seven games. We talked about that. Minnesota allowing the most passing yards in the highest yards per attempt. That's why we like DJ Chark. Since week five, they rank 29th in fantasy points allowed to the quarterback position. And my fantasy season is riding with Jared Gough. So this is not just like I'm saying, hey.
You know, if you're out there, I'd play Jared Goff. No, I am playing Jared Goff and my playoff run rests in his, his whole, his incapable hands. You're not just the president. Yes. You're also a member. And then I'm going to go with, I'm going to toss Trevor Lawrence right into that past funnel that the Titans love to throw at their opponent. 31st in passing yards per game allowed. That is the situation for the Titans. They don't give it up on the ground. Trevor Lawrence has been a quarterback won seven times this season, including five of the last seven games. Zay Jones, Christian Kirk. He has weapons that he can lean on. Evan Ingram, Schmevin, Schmingram. Yeah. Trevor Lawrence has just plain been a good quarterback. And if he's out there, I would throw him right in your lineup.
Yeah, at running back, I'm going with Ezekiel Elliott. Oh, please. Oh, he's going to have a monster game. Please. Over the last three weeks, no fades. Zika's finished, running back eight, running back 13, running back eight. I think you could have two top five running backs this week from the same team. Dallas right now, they're 17 point favorites. In games where a team is favored by 15 points or more, they average. 31 rush attempts per game because they're going to close this game out running the ball. And the Texans, they're just historically bad at stopping that run out of 416 teams since 2010. The Texans ranked 415th.
in rushing yards per game allowed. So both players are great starts this week. I'm going with Rahim Mostert versus the Los Angeles Chargers. I know there was a lot of discussion of Jeff Wilson or Mostert. Which one are you going with? If you have the two, we landed on Jeff Wilson. But this is more of a confidence play. I think that they both can be started because the Chargers are just that bad against the running back position. Again, though, he saw 61% of the snaps this past week. The game has a 51.5 point over under. That's the second highest of the week in the Chargers. One of the worst run defenses in the NFL. 29th and rushing yards per game allowed. 29th and expected points per rush attempt. 31st in schedule adjusted fancy points to the running back since week two. They're both an option this week. So I think that the giving you the confidence to play if you got Rahim Moster and you're kind of on the edge.
I think at the end of the day, they're both good. Yeah, and like I said, you know, six teams on by there. You need options at the running back position. My start of the week is a tandem as well. Joe Mixing coming back against Cleveland, a terrible run defense, 30th and run defense grade on PFF, dead last and rush defense on football outsiders. Mixing with a side of Pryan. I think this game could very well be the first borough victory and it could be by a wide margin. Pryan could. supplant mixing in the second half of this affair. Obviously spell them on third downs, maybe even take a drive away if they ease them back in. Both of these players are viable. P-Rine as a flex, mixing as a must start. So you're going to mix in some P-Rine. I'm going to mix in some pre-rine. I like it. I'm going with a stack at wide receiver. I've got Gino out there. I'm throwing Tyler Lockett in against Carolina. Carolina has not been able to stop the slot.
41% of Tyler Lockett's routes have been coming from that location. And also, he's just been unstoppable. Since week five, he's the wide receiver seven. He has a touchdown in five straight games. Don't, you know, Tyler Lockett's someone that you can't hesitate to start anymore. I am going with the wide receiver for Andy's quarterback. Christian Kirk. Christian Kirk's the wide receiver one. He's been fantastic. It is a little bit streaky, but. a 24.5% target share and the fifth most red zone targets. Andy highlighted everything for the passing yards against the Tennessee Titans, allowing the most passing yards in 32nd versus fantasy wide receiver. So I'm very excited for Christian Kirk this week. And plays A Jones as well. Agreed. Devante Smith, my wide receiver started the week against the Giants. It's easy to look at that big, special.
A.J. Brown game from last week and forget that the previous three weeks he had kind of struggled. Target share-wise, Devante Smith is right there with A.J. Brown, 28.5% for Brown, 25.6% for Smith. Smith went five for 102 and 1, and we all saw the highlights from A.J. Brown, but, you know, Devante Smith's been great. No Dallas Goddard. You talk about kind of consolidating options in this offense. If Kwez Watkins is hurt, it's probably just more Smith and more A.J. Brown. And the Giants ranked 25th and scheduled adjusted fantasy points allowed to wide receivers. The matchup, it seems like it could be very tough, but I think it's just going to be very exciting for the Philadelphia wide receiver route. That's good news. I hope Smith has a great game. I'm going at tight end with Gerald Everett. Mount Everett has been.
pretty solid this whole year. Against Miami, it's a very, very good matchup. Last week, Everett was very involved. Six targets, five for 80. The matchup is worth chasing because this is the second highest total of the week, 51.5 points, according to Draft King's Sportsbook. Since week seven, the dolphins are 30th in schedule adjusted fancy points allowed to opposing tight ends. So keep starting Gerald Everett. And the steel underpants tight end of the week. It is Hunter Henry against the Arizona Cardinals. It's a steel underpants situation because Hunter Henry has essentially had one, oh, no, two. I'm sorry, two good games this year. It has not been what you would hope for with Hunter Henry, who was a touchdown machine last year, but the matchup is there. You're going to have to wait for Monday. So you've got to stay in those underpants for a while for the payoff.
But we had the touchdown two weeks ago. He's creating a bunch of separation. And the Cardinals dead last versus fantasy tight-ins since week five. If you have been playing the tight end against Arizona, it has been working out far more than it has not. And with what's going on like Jacobi Myers situation for the Patriots, I think that Hunter Henry is in play. All right, my tight-in start of the week. I'm going to shine a light on one of the- the most dynamic young talents of the tight-in position. I like it. In the game of football, chig-a-conquo, tight-in. Who? Chig-a-conquo tied in for the Tennessee Titans. That name is B.A. As is his play. He is a really athletic.
Young prospect came out from Maryland, ran a 45240, which is 98th percentile. He looks like an oversized wide receiver out there. You may say, what in the world are you talking about? Chiga Conquo played 58% of snaps last week, four for 68 on the Titans offense. Trailing Burke's injured, unlikely to be out there. And the Jacksonville matchup is a good one. This is happening, right? This is a young tight end who is seeing the field more and more. Austin Hooper, yes, he's there. But this is a big play tight in. This is a downfield 40, 50 yard type of catch tight end. And I think they're going to need it. We talked about the pass funnel for the Titans defense. Jacksonville, I think, can keep up.
And I think Chig, a con quote, will be a very interesting player that we'll talk a lot more about in dynasty context in the future. Unfortunately, for all of us here at the Fantasy Footballers podcast, Brooks already has him. Are you kidding me? How do you always have everyone? I told you because he's got 60 roster spots. I don't know how you've manipulated the system to have everybody I ever look at. Does he have commission tools? Does he just go and pick him up, not on waivers? I don't know. Just adds to roster. Maybe he paid up for like the secret signing, so we never see him make the signing, but they just always end up on the teams. Don't look at my bench spots, how many I have. Yeah. Don't look. Sheater. It should be interesting, though. I think Tennessee may, I think Hooper and Conquo will both be involved this week. And you can see all of our rankings, the starts it tool and more on the website, the fantasy footballers.com. If you want access to premium tools.
The expanded StartSit tool where, you know, we see it every week. The StartSit tool is one of the most used resources on the Fantasy Footballers.com. If you want to expand it out to three or four players, you can support the show at Jointhefoot.com. Appreciate everybody who went out and voted for us yesterday at Foot Clan Vote as well. Yeah. The Foot Clan is mighty and strong. Keep it up. And has put it on display. So thank you very much. Before we close out, we got to get to the main event. Jason Moore's Ironclad, Locked and Loaded, 100% Guaranteed Boom Boom Kicker of the week. Last week on Boom Boom Kicker, I was floating in the open waters utterly blutterbonged. I was picked up like a baby. Was I uncomfortable? Maybe. Burgled by a seafaring kicker.
He took me to the mart. I was traded for two cups of farts taken by one Cameron Dicker. I thought I would carry a higher price tag. I have some notes. Okay. Number one, burgled is one of my favorite words of all time. Yeah. It is a fantastic word. But then the fact that in the, in the second line there, you brought in. The most inside of jokes, like a video that was passed around for our company that no one has any idea what you're talking about measuring farts in cups. Yeah. Sensational. This past week, Jason was enamored by the concept of measuring farts in cups. Yeah, and really any unit of like measurement. Yeah, because whether it's a teaspoon or up with water. Exactly.
No, that's great. Yeah. But I really was disappointed at my value, only being two cups of fart. I think that's a lot. I don't know. I don't know. I mean, it's a gas, so it can really spread very far. Yeah, how condensed is that cup? I feel like I should, I should be worth two gallons of farts. Two gallons? Two gallons of farts. But I only went for two cups. Yeah, at the mart. Yeah, at the marks, at the fart marked. Tomorrow we have the cup of cheese. The rest of the matchups, the wheel of shame. Oh, I wonder who it'll be. Twitter at the FF Ballers. If you want to follow along, we'll talk to you tomorrow. Enjoy the game tonight, everybody. Goodbye. Thank you for listening to another episode of the Fantasy Footballers podcast. Join our fantasy football community on join thefoot.com. And follow us on Twitter at the FF ballers.